How often have you read the words of an "inspirational" quote and actually been inspired? Did the words resound within you; did they make you feel that catch in your chest? You know the catch I'm talking about. It's that feeling you get when you read or hear words that could have originated from deep within you if only you'd had the ability to articulate your innermost beliefs--those words which propel your mind and emotions to action. Maybe words alone have never made you feel this way. Or perhaps you're the type of person who can find meaning on the side of a Starbucks cup. Either way, inspiration only goes so far. The real question is, how often have you used those words to propel yourself forward, as the impetus for action in your life?
The quote I've chosen for this week's Quote of the Week, is by Harvey Fierstein and when I read his words they did make me feel that catch in my chest.
Most people I've been associated with throughout my life--whether classmates, friends, or co-workers--don't realize just how much my family struggled during my adolescent years. (Now, before my family gets bent out of shape, reads this and starts assuming that I'm defaming the family name, that's not what I'm trying to do at all. I love my family, as flawed and dysfunctional as we are I can say that with the utmost sincerity. But that doesn't mean I can't envy those families who are able to show love and respect for one another at all times.) It wasn't just that we were poor and often ran out of grocery money after the first week of the month or had to heat bath water on the stove at times because the gas had been turned off, it was more than that. Much more. Like the pervasive alcohol and drug use that ran unchecked through my extended family. The volatile holidays with brothers fighting, flinging one another around the room and into the Christmas tree. And the extended shouting matches between Uncles and Aunts and Grandparents. Of course, all of this was considered "normal" by family standards and I didn't really think much about any of it until after I left Ohio and was able to see how the other half lived.
What does any of this have to do with Harvey Fierstein's quote? I'm getting to that.
You see, for the past few years I've been trying to change my life: to actually live in a world where the dreams I have are not just dreams but life goals. I thought I'd been doing a pretty good job of it, too, until someone casually mentioned that at times I, "hide behind my background." Those words hurt more than I wanted them to and I couldn't understand why, until I realized that they were true. As much as I've accomplished over the past few years in terms of obtaining the education I've always wanted, in certain situations, I was quick to assign failures to background related issues.
Here I am in the midst of living life on my terms, yet I'm still letting an underclass background define me.
Maybe I've grown up thinking that a person is always going to be a product of his environment, but if that's the case, I've been very wrong. To paraphrase someone who found the words while I was grasping for meaning, our environments and personalities exist in a fluid--ever-shifting--symbiotic relationship; each has influence upon the other, but only for a short time do they actually effect our current situations. Afterward, they're stored as experiences and, both, personality and environment change because of the addition to the foundations of each. Those who have the courage and insight, take these new experiences and motivate themselves as they move forward on the path of life, to achieve whatever dreams and desires fill their waking moments. Achievements can be many things and the greatest are glorious deeds.
While my background might have added to the foundation of who I am for a few years of my life, it can never define me. The only thing that can truly define who and what we are, is action, and each day we're given the opportunity to remake ourselves as we want to be seen. Of course, now that I realize my own excuses have been holding me back, showing me a false vision every time I look into the mirror, the only thing left to do is define myself from this moment forward.
Take some time and think about it. What moment or action have you let define you? Is it really who you are? And what has it stopped you from achieving?
The quote I've chosen for this week's Quote of the Week, is by Harvey Fierstein and when I read his words they did make me feel that catch in my chest.
Most people I've been associated with throughout my life--whether classmates, friends, or co-workers--don't realize just how much my family struggled during my adolescent years. (Now, before my family gets bent out of shape, reads this and starts assuming that I'm defaming the family name, that's not what I'm trying to do at all. I love my family, as flawed and dysfunctional as we are I can say that with the utmost sincerity. But that doesn't mean I can't envy those families who are able to show love and respect for one another at all times.) It wasn't just that we were poor and often ran out of grocery money after the first week of the month or had to heat bath water on the stove at times because the gas had been turned off, it was more than that. Much more. Like the pervasive alcohol and drug use that ran unchecked through my extended family. The volatile holidays with brothers fighting, flinging one another around the room and into the Christmas tree. And the extended shouting matches between Uncles and Aunts and Grandparents. Of course, all of this was considered "normal" by family standards and I didn't really think much about any of it until after I left Ohio and was able to see how the other half lived.
What does any of this have to do with Harvey Fierstein's quote? I'm getting to that.
You see, for the past few years I've been trying to change my life: to actually live in a world where the dreams I have are not just dreams but life goals. I thought I'd been doing a pretty good job of it, too, until someone casually mentioned that at times I, "hide behind my background." Those words hurt more than I wanted them to and I couldn't understand why, until I realized that they were true. As much as I've accomplished over the past few years in terms of obtaining the education I've always wanted, in certain situations, I was quick to assign failures to background related issues.
Here I am in the midst of living life on my terms, yet I'm still letting an underclass background define me.
Maybe I've grown up thinking that a person is always going to be a product of his environment, but if that's the case, I've been very wrong. To paraphrase someone who found the words while I was grasping for meaning, our environments and personalities exist in a fluid--ever-shifting--symbiotic relationship; each has influence upon the other, but only for a short time do they actually effect our current situations. Afterward, they're stored as experiences and, both, personality and environment change because of the addition to the foundations of each. Those who have the courage and insight, take these new experiences and motivate themselves as they move forward on the path of life, to achieve whatever dreams and desires fill their waking moments. Achievements can be many things and the greatest are glorious deeds.
While my background might have added to the foundation of who I am for a few years of my life, it can never define me. The only thing that can truly define who and what we are, is action, and each day we're given the opportunity to remake ourselves as we want to be seen. Of course, now that I realize my own excuses have been holding me back, showing me a false vision every time I look into the mirror, the only thing left to do is define myself from this moment forward.
Take some time and think about it. What moment or action have you let define you? Is it really who you are? And what has it stopped you from achieving?
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